Adieu.

I've never been good with goodbyes. My dad is an overseas worker so he often leaves for another country and he’d be gone for months, nine being the longest. He started going abroad since I was maybe 3 or 4 years of age so you would think that I would be used to the idea of bidding him farewell. Sadly, that’s not the case.


I always sucked when it came to letting go. It could be a neighbor that I haven’t been really close to, a distant classmate, an estranged co-worker, a random stranger (OR NOT, LOL.)—as long as the thought of that person leaving enters my mind, I would get teary-eyed at one point or another. Even just listening to sad, letting go songs would instantly play random departure images in my head. I would think of not seeing a certain person and be overwhelmed by the thought, producing unsolicited heavy tears. And now, the time has come that I will be the one leaving.


I’ve been working for two years now and I’ve never been so happy being employed like how I am now. I am an online English tutor for Koreans and I know that my profession would raise an eyebrow or two, given the expectations the people around me have for me. I am a Nursing graduate and yeah, I honestly DESPISED the fact that I had to undergo 4 crucial years studying illnesses, pathophysiologies and what-not. I took the local Nursing Licensure Exam TWICE, and with the same number, have also failed. I was frustrated beyond measure and little did I know that I was rebelling against every principle that I’ve held for 20 years of existence. I began having vices, I hated the thought of going home. I ventured the call center industry, something that I vowed not to be involved with when I was still in college. I was bitter, insecure and deep inside, I believed that I was dumb all along.


Life took an interesting turn when I began tutoring for Koreans. First, I had one-on-one private lessons, introduced by my best friend and his then girlfriend. I just tried it out because I’ve come to realize that being a call center agent was not for me after all. I had to learn that the hard way, though.


I was finally a tutor. For six months, I got to know each and every one of my students. I was having a blast and I never thought I’d actually fall in love with them. They eventually went back to Korea and three crucial weeks of being stuck at home almost drove me insane. I was a bum and I hated every single moment of it. Finally, my best friend’s then girlfriend sent me a message and invited me to apply in Edubox in the Phils., an online English academy for Koreans. I didn’t have second thoughts of going there and trying it out.


Fast-forward to one year, I’m still here.


Now, though, life is taking another turn for me. The time came wherein I really have to take the local NLE. AGAIN. And I promised myself that this will be the last time. I have come to realize that I actually wasted four years of education if I would not become a nurse. I refuse to believe now that I am not capable of passing an exam such as the NLE. A lot of people have done it, why can’t I?


With the decision of taking the boards again this coming December comes the inevitable choice of leaving Edubox. I have to put ten times more effort into reviewing and I believe that wouldn’t be possible if I would be juggling work and the review. So, I have to let go of one thing to take hold of another.


Leaving will be hard because I have come to love this company more than I can express. I have met interesting people more than my hands and feet combined can count. I have listened to so many stories, took part on random activities, gained and lost a lot —- weight and money, respectively (LOL) , witnessed arguments and reconciliations, imparted knowledge and learned more in return, experienced so many memorable *firsts*, tossed and turned around my bed so many times to think, loved and was loved in return (yiiii), had many issues and was able to surpass them all, and I basically had the best year of my life.


Of course, my heart will long for my favorite students, even the ones that I’ve fought relentlessly with. I know I would have to adjust to the thought of not waking up and preparing to go to work. I also have to endure the ugly fact that I would be penniless for three months or so. Yeah, must suck to be me. LOL.


And now that I’m “leaving”, I am going to miss each and every one of the people that have made my stay in EBIP awesome. If only I could fast-forward the crucial process of taking the boards and be back in EBIP, I would. Sadly, I've no universal remote control similar to that in the movie Click, so I have to really undergo all I have to undergo in order to be successful.


My friends in EBIP will forever be remembered by me and they’ll be here in my heart forever. Cheesy as frack but the truth, more often than not, sucks more than it should. So, yeah.


I’ll be missing you all. ♥


~’til we meet again.~



Remember me sometimes,


Abby